Here's a column for yuhh

Our server is a young woman with a friendly, outgoing manner.

"I'll be right back with some water for yuhh," she says.

After lunch I stop at the bank to cash a small check.

"That's 20, 40, five, six, seven dollars for yuhh," the young woman at the counter says with a smile.

My wife and I stop at an espresso stand.

"Awright," the barista says. "One coffee with milk and a green tea for yuhh."

When did it become mandatory to add for yuhh on the end of the simple sentences of everyday exchanges?

For yuhh is frequently attached these days to otherwise mundane declarations by a young person, often female, whose job involves working with the public. The unspoken implication seems to be that the object or action alluded to is part of some sort of personal service that goes the extra mile. It's not just water, it's water for yuhh.

The last syllable is slightly drawn out and given a bit of a throaty inflection: for yu-hhh.

Here's a game for yuhh. The next time you spend a day running errands and shopping around town, count how many times you hear a young woman doing her job say "for yuhh."

This will be a chuckle for yuhh.

Sometimes it just doesn't make sense. As in, at the drive-through window, "That'll be $5.99 for yuhh."

No. It's not $5.99 for me. It is, in fact, $5.99 for them. The burger is for me. The money is still mine at the moment, but the instant I decide on the burger the money is for them.

Whatever. I know it's all good. But I've been there, done that. And I'm givin' it 110 percent here, and it's no senior moment. Hel-LO-O?

Excu-use me, but don't even go there. I mean, whassup with that? I'm going postal here, 24/seven. You are so-o dead.

Here's a scary idea for yuhh. What if this thing spreads?

Here's your doctor telling you that you have coronary artery disease.

"Looks like a quadruple bypass for yuhh."

The wrestler playing the heavy on a Wild Wrestling Federation show tells a wrestler playing the good guy what he's going to do to him.

"Here's a Mongolian Death Butt for yuhh!"

Comic Eddie Izzard works it into a routine on what it might have been like if instead of the Spanish, the English, with their rituals and their manners, had run the Inquisition.

"We have death for yuhh, and we have cake for yuhh. Cake? Death? Cake? Death? For yuhhhh."

A judge sentences a defendant.

"Here's 20 to life for yuhh."

What if this had been around forever?

Fourscore and seven years ago, our fathers brought forth on this continent and new nation for yuhh.

To be or not to be. That is the question for yuhh.

In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth. And the earth was without form, and void, and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.

And God said, Let there be light for yuhhhhhh.

Share This Story